Living Out Loud

Stop resisting stuff

(part of the Happy Friday series)

What you resist persists.

This isn’t my opinion, it’s a spiritual law. I can tell you though that I have plenty of personal experience to back it up! If you think about it, I’m sure you’ll find you do too.

What is meant by resistance is not wanting what you currently have in your life, or focusing on the lack of what you do want. It’s the good old Law of Attraction at work again. Your thoughts, feelings and actions – the vibrations you offer out into the Universe – attracting like energy back to you – events and experiences that match your vibration.

Therefore, if there is a situation in your life that you are struggling with, either mentally, physically or emotionally, you are impeding your own ability to move through it. What you want to be rid of, you are continually attracting back to you. Or if it’s a lack of something you’re focussing on, then you’re continually attracting that lack to you.

So, what to do?

Accept the present as it is, that’s what!

“Accept the present and intend the future.” ~ Deepak Chopra

Intending the future is being clear about how you would like things to be, and trusting that they will in fact work out that way, or even better, eventhough right now it’s not looking all that likely.

Easier said than done? Definitely.

Do-able? Absolutely.

How? Well, I’m sure different people have different techniques for that, and really whatever works best for you is just fine. Personally, I always use affirmations when I become conscious that I’m resisting something. By using affirmations appropriate to the situation, I begin to change my thoughts about it and consequently change the vibration I’m putting out there.

If you want to try this technique ~

1. Write out an affirmation (or several) that resonates with you
2. Post them on your fridge, bathroom mirror, inside your front door, car dashboard – anywhere that you’ll get to see and read them several times a day.
3. Recite them as often as possible – with positive feeling

If you’re new to using affirmations, it might (scratch that, it probably will) feel a bit silly to begin with. Especially as what you’re declaring doesn’t match what you believe and feel.

Yet!

But repeated use of affirmations can have a very calming effect. AND they help you to change your beliefs, and build your sense of trust in yourself and the Universe.

Here are some of my favourites:

“It is the way it is. I accept that.” ~ Stuart Wilde

“I do not struggle against the whole universe by struggling against this moment. My acceptance is total and complete. I accept things as they are this moment, not as I wish they were.” ~ Deepak Chopra

“All is well, no matter what it looks like. It’s all happening perfectly.” ~ Susan Jeffers

“I am safe; it’s only change. I cross all bridges with joy and ease. The ‘old’ unfolds into wonderful new experiences.” ~ Louise L Hay

“I do not resist this situation. I put it in the hands of Infinite Love and Wisdom and let the divine idea now come to pass.” ~ Florence Scovell Shinn

“I am at peace. I trust it will all work out perfectly.” ~ Hilda Carroll ;-)

There are two keys to using affirmations:

1. Repetition
2. Feelings

As you’re reciting them, feel the feelings as though the future you’re intending has already manifested in the present. (yes, really!)

Ya, ya, I can hear your loud objections from here. But you can do this – all it takes is practice. And if you do practice this it will help you to accept the present as it is. And when you accept it, you will feel better about it. It think that’s what they call a virtuos circle ;-)

Well it beats a vicious circle, doesn’t it! And let me tell you, if you choose resistance over acceptance the vicious circle is where you’re more likely to get stuck.

My challenge as ever: try it for a week (with an open mind), and see how you get on!

(For a short and helpful post on how affirmations work, read this on Kirsten Harrell’s site. She has a tonne of affirmations for you to choose from too.)

Similar Posts:

Accept the present as it is

"Shine" your way to happiness with uplifting music

(a part of the Happy Friday series)

I’m sure if I did a search I could find numerous studies out there that have proven the effects of music on our moods. But I’m not going to go to that trouble because I’m also fairly certain that you’ve all experienced it for yourself.

The point I am going to try and sell on though, is the importance of the lyrics as well as the tone of the music. You really do want both to be uplifting!

When the music itself is upbeat, your spirits are uplifted. That’s what you already know. But if you’re not a dedicated follower of the Law of Attraction, you might not be aware of the importance that lyrics have also.

All of your words are very powerful. What you say about yourself and your life is a vibration you are offering to the Universe and you’re going to attract like energy back. Words that you express with feeling will manifest in physical reality with greater speed. When you sing to upbeat, uplifting music, the lyrics you’re reciting offer a very powerful vibration. So be careful that the lyrics you’re offering reflect what you want in your life!

Choose the songs you sing out loud to with great care.

Last summer I started a project here called Songs to make your Heart sing. I wanted to make a compilation of songs that did just that for me, and I asked for help in coming up with as big a list as possible. Afterwards I made my own personal choices from the list taking not only the music but also the lyrics into consideration. Why not ask your friends to help you do something similar? Or if you want a kick-start check out the playlist suggested by those who took part in my project.

My own nomination for the playlist was Shine by Take That. Click below to see the video. The lyrics are further below. I think they are fabulous, and I always sing them from the perspective of my Higher Self (she who knows and trusts that all is well) speaking to my Ego (she who resists the present moment rather than accepting it).

For me, it creates a wonderful shift in my energy and my thought process. Why not try it and see for yourself?

You, you're such a big star to me
You're everything I wanna be
But you're stuck in a hole and I want you to get out
I don't know what there is to see
But I know it's time for you to leave
We're all just pushing along
Trying to figure it out, out, out.

All your anticipation pulls you down
When you can have it all, you can have it all.

So come on, so come on, get it on
Don't know what you're waiting for
Your time is coming don't be late, hey hey
So come on
See the light on your face
Let it shine
Just let it shine
Let it shine.

Stop being so hard on yourself
It's not good for your health
I know that you can change
So clear your head and come around
You only have to open your eyes
You might just get a big surprise
And it may feel good and you might want to smile, smile, smile.

Don't you let your demons pull you down
'Cause you can have it all, you can have it all.

Hey let me know you
You're all that matters to me
Hey let me show you
You're all that matters to me.

Hey let me love you
You're all that matters to me
Hey let me love you
You're all that matters to me

So come on
See the light on your face
Let it shine
Just let it shine
Let it shine.

Give what you want to receive

(part of the Happy Friday series)

"What you sow is what you reap."

We all know (don't we?) that the energy we put out into the world comes right back to us. The experiences we have in our lives are always reflecting our thoughts and feelings - the energy we are emitting. Well, that is my belief anyway.

And according to the Law of Attraction, it doesn't really matter whether you believe it or not. It still affects your every experience in life. If you're not already sold on the idea, try paying attention to what you're thinking and feeling over the coming week, and notice what's going on in your life at the same time. You'll be amazed at the corelation!

Whatever it is you want to receive more of in your life, try giving more of that to those around you. Give love, money, attention, support and you will receive love, money, attention and support – just so long as you give it from a place of genuine love and caring for others. This is absolutely key.

Give what you want to receive, but don't give in order to receive.

If you give in order to receive, you will negate the receiving effect. This is because your underlying intention is based in a feeling of lack - that is the energy you’re emitting and therefore you will continue to attract that lack.

But when you focus on genuinely seeking to help and serve others, you will discover, in many surprising ways, that you are receiving much of the same - and often much, much more - back into your own life.

If you're new to the Law of Attraction, why not try this as an experiment over the coming week and share your experiences here?

Feel Abundant

(a Thought for the Week)

“Abundance doesn't follow giving until giving becomes its own reward.” ~ Jan Denise

“Expect your every need to be met. Expect the answer to every problem, expect abundance on every level.” ~ Eileen Caddy

“When you have too much month for you paycheck, then what you need to do is realize that there is abundance all around you and focus on the abundance and not your lack and as night follows day abundance will come to you.” ~ Sidney Madwed

“Feeling abundant surpasses the money in your bank account and transcends what others may think of you. Genuinely feeling abundant and successful is possible when you detach yourself from the things you desire and allow them to flow to you – and through you.” ~ Wayne Dyer

You can view my Thoughts archive here

Develop an attitude of Gratitude

Gratitude is one of the most powerful happiness boosters you could ever experience. When you are being grateful, you are putting positive attention on the things in your life that you are pleased to be experiencing. And when you notice the good things, you feel good.

When you notice the good things every day, you feel great!

What’s more, gratitude is also a happiness magnet because what we focus on grows. If you’re familiar with the law of attraction, you’ll be aware that the more positive things you focus on in your life the more of that comes your way. Likewise with the bad stuff – if you’re constantly looking out for the next bad thing to hit you, it won’t be long in showing up! So, best to focus on the blessings ;-)

Focusing on all the reasons to be grateful also takes the sting out of the not so great experiences. It’s easier to cope with life’s tougher moments, and to value the lesson learned from it, when you know you have plenty to be thankful for.

So, if you’re serious about improving your level of happiness, why not try consciously developing a gratitude habit? During the course of your day, take the time to deliberately notice pleasant things in your environment, and express your pleasure about the good stuff in life more than you complain about the bad stuff (really try to keep the complaints to a minimum).

A great thing to do is to keep a gratitude journal - every day make a list of at least five things you are grateful for. Be thankful for the little things, not just the big.

When you make this a daily practice, you will find yourself consciously looking out for things to be grateful for. This opens your mind to a more positive outlook, and starts to feed into the thought pattern you need to positively affect your feelings. And of course, it attracts more of the good things into your life, giving you more blessings to count and feel happy about. I think that’s what they call a virtuous circle!

By focusing your attention in this positive manner you will open yourself up to experience more of the same, and better. The more gratitude you feel, the happier you will be. Guaranteed!

This post is part of a new series of Happiness Tips published on Fridays. Comments and suggestions are very welcome. What advice would you offer? What works for you when you want to deliberately feel happier?

Happiness tip: accept the present as it is

Ok, maybe it’s not perfect, but it is your reality for now.  But in all probability it will not be your reality forever.  As the immortal saying goes, this too will pass.

However, there is an important universal law to observe which simply states "that which you resist persists".  It’s a derivative of the Law of Attraction which in its simplest form is about your experiences in your life reflecting the energy you put out into the world.  That energy comes from your thoughts, and most especially your feelings.

If your energy is focused on struggling with a situation in your life, you will continue to attract that struggle.  Resisting your present circumstances in your life usually sets up a mindset of worry about your future, and places stress on your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual well-being in the present.  It reduces the capacity of your inner resources to deal with the situation in a creative, constructive manner.  The more depleted your inner resources are the more difficult it will be for you to cope with the situation, find solutions and move beyond it.

When you accept that this is the reality you have to deal with for now, you free up your energy and your inner strength to move through the situation rather than getting stuck in it.  Acceptance does not mean denying or ignoring the circumstance.  It means acknowledging the full truth about what is going on for you right now, what the gap is between where you are now and where you want to be, and what needs to happen in order for you to move in that direction.  Acceptance empowers you to move forward.  Resistance keeps you stuck where you are.

14 Day Kick in the Booty Challenge

Today, I've finally gotten round to taking up Kammie K's 14 day challenge.  I was procrastinating because I wanted to find something relatively easy (and fun) that I could commit to easily and know I'd persist with it.  But the whole time at the back of my mind I knew I really wanted to take on a tough and physical challenge.

I'm tired of stating the intention every day to be fit and healthy, and then not acting in alignment with that goal.  My last cholestorel score was 6.9, and though it's more down to genetics than lifestyle I know it's possible to get it down to a safe level.  Generally I do eat healthily, but over my two weeks in France I ate ALOT of cheese, and had dessert nearly every evening.  And when it comes to exercise, I lazily let myself off the hook given any excuse.

But enough is enough.  I want a new cholestorel score, one of 5 or lower.  And I want it now!  So, for the next 14 days I commit to a full hour of exercise: 40 minutes of aerobics and 20 minutes of upper/lower body exercise on alternate days.  The aerobic side is going to be tough.  Today, I only managed 30 minutes - I might have to work up to the 40.  But that's ok, I'd rather start off easy and up the intensity than overdo it at the start and wind up falling off the wagon.

Care to join me?  What do you really, really want that you're not committing to?  How would a little bit of action every day for two weeks contribute to the achievement of that?  Remember, the Law of Attraction tells us we can't just think and feel our way to what we desire, we must also act as if we're already there.  I now act as a fit and healthy person.  How are you acting?   

Direct positive attention towards what you want

(a Thought for the Week)

"Our thoughts create our reality -- where we put our focus is the direction we tend to go." -- Peter McWilliams

"All the breaks you need in life wait within your imagination. Imagination is the workshop of your mind, capable of turning mind energy into accomplishment and wealth." -- Napoleon Hill

"Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you." -- Oprah Winfrey

"When you are in the valley, keep your goal firmly in view and you will get the renewed energy to continue the climb. -- Denis Waitley

"Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones." -- Mike Dooley

You can see my Thoughts archive here

Tend to your life as if it were a garden

I read two interesting posts this week about how gardening can be a good metaphor for living a good life.  (It must be the time of year ;-)

"If you have a lot of weeds in your life, consider the fact that ripping them out might be hard, but isn’t it always more beautiful to wake up to a great looking garden than a bare wasteland?"

On Breathing Prosperity Ophelia talks about how your life reflects the seeds you planted - have you cared for your plants or allowed weeds to grow? - in Life is like a box of chocolates... no, it's like gardening

"Treat each plant the way it wants to be treated.  Some plants crave nitrogen, some magnesium, some potassium, some a mixture, and some prefer neutrality.  While you can make generalities, treat every plant the same, and have an average garden, you can treat each plant the way it wants to be treated and have a fabulous garden."

The above is just one of fourteen lessons Debra Moorhead has learned about gardening that apply equally well to life.  Read What Gardening has taught me about Life.

Both these posts resonated deeply with me, and probably because I wrote a similar article for my ezine last year (and round about this time).  And so I was inspired to dig it out and post it here:

LoveCat Friday

It's Friday - time to spread the love.

Over at My Secret Spiritual Dance (what a great name!) Pamm's article on Law of Attraction: Money and Flow reminded me of an important lesson just when I needed it: trust that all is well, no matter how it looks.  It is a wonderful post about how our current financial situation reflects our current relationship with our higher selves.

Kirsten's Tips for Meditation post was also really helpful.  One of the reasons I've been struggling with meditation on and off for the last couple of years is thinking I've been doing it wrong!  Lately I've been meditating consistently (thanks in no small part to Leo's May Challenge at Zen Habits) despite that belief, thinking that "someday" I'll get there.  Having read this post I'm now completely at peace with my meditation practice.

"Aiming for better is admirable, possibly even noble... but striving for perfection is stupid...The moment we stop chasing perfection and start aiming for enlightenment (self-awareness, self-realisation, a different way of thinking and being) is the moment we start to move towards genuine happiness."  In Happily Imperfect, Craig Harper urges us to shed our obsession with perfection and learn to love our imperfect selves. 

Raymond at ZenChill.com introduced me to wonderful Easy World, a place I live in sometimes.  My intention is to spend more and more time there, hopefully even retire there (and sooner rather than later).  If you'd like to live in Easy World too check out How to Make your Life Easier.

I'd also like to thank Rosa Say for her very generous community profile on Joyful Jubilant Learning.

That's it for this week.  Have a lovely weekend everybody - I'll be back on Monday with another Thought for the Week.