In July of this year I decided to move to the West of Ireland. A dream of mine for about three years, that I only this year developed the courage to follow through on. And in August I settled on the perfect town to move to: Westport, Co. Mayo.
I then spent six weeks or so searching for the perfect house to live in. I had many specific requirements, and needed to be reasonably picky about my new home. But my pickiness seemed to be paying off when I found the perfect house that not only met, but exceeded all my needs. I was delighted!
But then it all fell apart at the last minute, and I realised that I had become too attached to the dream of living in that house. Not only that, but I reluctantly accepted that I had become too attached to the dream of living in Westport. I realised I needed to detach.
Oh I didn't want to let go! But I knew I needed to. So I set the intention to surrender and spent a day and a half singing the song "I surrender all" to myself, over and over.
By the end of that week, everything had turned around and I found myself back on the road to Westport to view another house. Not quite as "perfect" as the previous one, but which actually turned out to be more perfect for me and where I'm at right now than the more aesthetically pleasing one that had slipped through my hands.
And now, here I am! Living in Westport. And I like my little house. Space-wise and aesthetics-wise it's not quite my dream home. But it really is good enough, and comfortable enough, and meets all my needs. And I'm happy in it.
Wherever I live, I make it home. It's all about the energy you bring to the place. And those who have visited me so far seem to like the energy : )
The same applies to creating any experience in my life - it's all about the energy I bring to it. Desperate clinging equals resistance, and keeps what I want out of my reach. But surrendering my desire, being willing to give up what I really, really want and accept what is delivered to me instead, never fails to bring me exactly what I wanted - although it often looks completely different to how I had originally imagined!
Surrendering is about handing over to Spirit. Accepting that you can't see the bigger picture, and that goal you're struggling to achieve may not be for your highest good. Eventhough your ego really wants it, surrendering means being willing to do without it, and trusting that if it's really meant for you, it will come at the right time. Maybe now just isn't the right time. And maybe something else - something possibly even better - is what's meant for you.
The sad thing is, that eventhough I know this, I don't easily surrender my desires. Surrender and detachment are a constant challenge for me. But I resolve to keep working on it. It may take me the rest of my life to master it, but I know it's for my highest good, so I'm not going to give up on giving up ;-)