Be Kind to yourself and others

Kindness is a generosity of spirit that comes to life when we give of ourselves, and our time, to be of help to others without expecting anything in return. When you show kindness to somebody you bring out the best in yourself, and a side-effect of brightening up somebody else’s day is to feel happier in the moment yourself. 

In recent times I've started to pay attention to the impact my behaviour has on others, and to notice my own feelings in association to their reactions.  When I see that something I've said or done has been of help to someone, I get a huge warm fuzzy from it.  I bet you do too. 

Think about how you feel yourself when somebody else shows you kindness.  What greater reward could there be than to regularly give that feeling to others through small but thoughtful acts?  And the best bit is that what you give comes back to you in even greater quantity. When you are kind, you not only get an immediate payback in terms of a feel-good factor, you will also receive kindness from others, and in completely unexpected and unrelated ways.

It is so easy to find ways to be kind to others - here are just a few ideas:

• say something supportive when you instinctively feel someone needs to hear it
• offer help without being asked for it; smile encouragingly
• swallow your criticisms; listen without judgement
• let mistakes slide instead of assigning blame
• make small sacrifices for the benefit of somebody in greater need

Oh yes, being kind to othes is a sure-fire strategy for boosting your own happiness.  But don't forget to be kind to yourself as well!

A great rule of thumb I apply to my life is to not only do unto others as I’d have them do unto me, but to also do unto myself as I’d do unto others.

The latter part is just as important as the first, but often the part we don't give too much attention to.  All sorts of societal factors have caused us to ignore our real need for self-care, but I don't care why we do it anymore, I just want us all to stop ignoring that need and start being kind to ourselves all of the time.

It is no good to be consistently kind to others and forget to be so to yourself. You will run out of steam, and feel less able to show kindness to others if you don’t replenish your own mind, body and spirit on a regular basis.

Being kind to yourself means getting your needs met, being gentle with yourself instead of critical when you feel you’re not performing at your best, forgiving yourself when the need arises instead of beating yourself up. It means taking care of yourself first and foremost, and then from a place of strength you can go out there and give to the world.  When you get into the habit of treating yourself with kindness, it becomes much easier to extend that consideration and behaviour to others.

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This post is an amended version of an article I originally wrote for my ezine The Game of Life.  To read similar articles click here.

Comments

[Karen Lynch]

Great Post! I feel a happy energy here!

[Hilda]

Thanks Karen! I only recently discovered your own blog, and I'm enjoying it very much. Love the latest post "High Heels and Struggles" - recognise that girl in the suit also ;-)

all the best,

H.

[marcia siegel]

being kind involves awareness. it means that you can not react to what is going on. observation and a pause will help you be kind. being kind also means being respectful of yourself and others.
great post. it reminded me to stay kind.